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The Wine Ceremony
Welcome to the marriage of GROOM and BRIDE. The poet Kahlil
Gibran once wrote: "Love one another, but not make a bond
of love. Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores
of your souls. Fill each other's cup, but drink not from
one cup. Give one another of your bread, but not eat from
the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but
let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute
are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your
hearts, but not into each other's keeping. For only the
hand of life can contain your hearts. And stand together,
yet not too near together, For the pillars of the temple
stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in
each other's shadow."
Minister to Groom: GROOM, when you love someone, you do
not love them all the time, in exactly the same way, from
moment to moment. That is impossible. It is even a lie to
pretend it is possible. And yet that is exactly what most of
us demand. We insist on permanence, on duration, on
continuity. The only continuity possible in life as in love is
in growth, in fluidity, and in freedom, as dancers are free,
barely touching as they pass, but partners in creating the
same pattern.
Minister to Bride: BRIDE, the only real security is not
in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not
even in hoping. Security in a relationship lies neither in
looking back nostalgically to what it was, nor forward in
dread or anticipation to what it might be. It is loving in the
present relationship, accepting it as it is now. Relationships
must be like islands, which one must accept for what they are
here and now with their limits, islands surrounded and
interrupted by the sea, continually visited and abandoned by
the tide. One must accept the security of the ebb and flow of
intimacy.
The Bride and Groom pour each other a glass of
wine.
The years of our lives are a cup of wine poured out
for us to drink. The grapes when they are pressed give forth
good juices for the wine. Under the winepress of time, our
lives give forth labor and honor and love. Many days you will
sit at the same table and eat and drink together. Drink now
and may the cup of your lives be sweet and full to running
over.
The
Bride and Groom touch their glasses and drink a sip of
wine.
Now, GROOM
and BRIDE, will you take vows here, before all of us, which
symbolize the many unseated vows you have al
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